May 10, 2007

anti-social smokers?

Contrary to the belief that smoking is mainly a sociable habit, taken up by impressionable young people in order to fit in with a crowd -- a belief upon which anti-smoking deterrents are based -- Topaz, 23, took it up because she wanted to keep people -- especially men -- away from her!

"It's the most effective way I know to avoid unwanted attentions," laughs Topaz, "and when some pushy guy dares to break into my personal space to tell me how much I stink, and how unattractive he thinks smoking women are, it only reinforces my belief that smoking is one of the best defences a girl can have."

"I know that a lot of smokers -- men and women -- feel very threatened by this sort of abuse," says Topaz, "but in today's anti-smoking climate you cannot really expect people to behave otherwise towards you."

"Social smokers are extremely vulnerable to this sort of abuse," explains Topaz, "and that's why they're quitting in droves. They cannot handle people hating them. They want so much to be loved that they'd eat dog poo is someone influential told them it would make them more lovable. Poor souls!"

"The self-medicating smokers are terribly defensive when faced with abuse from anti-smokers," says Topaz. "They are likely to respond with equal abuse or slink back into their shells of despair depending upon their personalities or size."

"As for anti-social smokers like me, it's water off a duck's back," laughs Topaz, "and yes, I do understand the irony of my situation. I realize that smoking in public is likely to attract attention -- which I don't want -- but if I did NOT smoke I would receive a lot more attention. Get it?"

"Some girls -- consciously or otherwise -- actually put on weight to avoid unwanted attentions," says Topaz, "and that option was not attractive to me. I wouldn't like myself if I were fat. Smoking suited my purposes perfectly."

"If you cannot understand why I took up smoking to avoid unwanted attention then you are either a man or a very ugly girl," laughs Topaz. "I have been hassled by men since I was a little girl, and I just didn't want to be preyed on any more."

"Also, I didn't want other girls being mean to be because I am better looking than they are."

"I didn't want to solve this problem by making myself unattractive --- putting on weight, wearing ugly spectacles or wearing false buck teeth," laughs Topaz, "and I couldn't hide myself in a burka like women in other cultures do, so I decided to take up a dirty, stinking, disgusting habit that would make me a universal pariah."

"It worked like a charm," laughs Topaz, "and what's more, I enjoy it."

"No, I wouldn't say that I am anti-social -- a loner -- by nature," explains Topaz, "but I am probably a lot more self-contained than most people are."

"I have a good job, I'm paid very well and my boss -- a woman -- disapproves of my habit without disapproving of me," says Topaz. "She understands why I started smoking and just tells me not to smoke around her!"

"As for boyfriends," laughs Topaz, "I choose them rather than them choosing me."

"When I see a guy I like, I won't smoke if he's not smoking -- and yes, I can stop smoking when I want to because I'm not doing it to medicate myself."

"Preferably, I'd choose a guy who doesn't smoke because I don't want to take on a guy who may have problems," says Topaz, "and besides which I want children one day."

"I wasn't raised in a smoking home and I wouldn't want my children to be exposed to extra pollutants while they are developing," explains Topaz. "Our environment is toxic enough with vehicle and industrial pollutants and while adults can take it I don't believe little children can."

"Am I an anti-social menace because I smoke?" asks Topaz. "Well, I suppose I am in a way, but in a society that's anti-social towards me -- encouraging men to be predatory and women to be their playthings -- a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do to protect herself."

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